Recently I had a discussion about a private part of my life with some friends on IRC. This is not something I generally do, but occasionally the urge to open up is strong and I usually figure the universe is trying to tell me something.
The topic of our conversation was Khabism. Khabi is a very ancient belief system that came from Babylon (the cradle of the world) and was passed down quietly through Persian writings and oral traditions. Wiccans and Pagans in small numbers have embraced the way of Khabi and still practice it today, as (I am told) some other Mithra-influenced religions do. Most Khabists are not very vocal about the practice.
Khabism teaches that all things-- every object and intangible in the universe-- can and should be used for the expression of passionate love. When two people pledge eternal love, fidelity, and sexual union, they should then view the entirety of creation as their tool in expressing that love.
What does that mean?
A Khabist tries to see the entire world around him or her as an opportunity for expressions of love with his or her life-mate. All things have two roles: the primary role in eternity and the secondary role-- as a tool of love. So a knife might be for cutting, but it could also be used to lovingly caress the flesh of one's mate. An apple might be for eating, but it could also be used as a way to flavor the skin with sweetness or titillate the nerve endings with texture and temperature.
All things are tools of love for a Khabist. Most modern Khabi practitioners (all those I know) are wiccan. As such, Khabi plays a part in our worship and often includes itself in our Great Rite (which is a ritual expression of sexuality celebrating the dual nature of life).
One of the more controversial issues for Khabists is the practice of Sacred Sharing. This is often misunderstood as 'swinging' or 'wife swapping.' Nothing could be further from the truth. While I respect the views and practices of others, I do not condone, nor do I recommend, either of these. Few marriages are strong enough to sustain such sharing, and NO marriage or committed relationship is strengthened by selfish hedonism.
Sacred Sharing has nothing to do with these practices. Khabists who engage in Sharing (not all do) approach it from an entirely different perspective. The third person in the sexual act (or third and fourth persons, on some occasions) is viewed as an instrument of ecstasy and the ultimate expression of love. Sacred Sharing takes place rarely-- on very specific nights conforming to ritual requirements-- and only happens with individuals who have known one another for a very, very long time. It is standard practice for these couples or individuals to share STD testing information and generally they have known one another intimately OUTSIDE the Sharing experience for many years.
When this sacred act takes place it is done as an expression of ultimate love between two individuals and as a tribute to the Divine. Only one couple is the focus of the ritual. Neither takes pleasure as an individual without the other's active participation and support.
Whatever swingers and swappers may claim, all evidence indicates that the practice is meant to "spice up" or "broaden" the sexual experience of the couple in question. This is, in my opinion (and in Khabist teaching), the primary flaw in the practice. The motivation is primarily selfish and sexual... it is, in other words, just the act of a horny and bored couple. This indicates desperation, lonliness, a sense of incompletion, and unhealthy commitment in the relationship.
Khabists are celebrating their love for one another by giving one another the gift of sacred sex, and by enhancing the experience with the addition of another spiritual person who shares their dedication to the practice. The third (or third and fourth, on some occasions) participant/s know they are secondary and are there not for themselves, but for the couple being celebrated in the rite. Those who engage in this practice have VERY strong marriages, VERY strong beliefs, and are VERY secure before even considering it.
Much of what Khabists do is very private and closely guarded as sacred, personal, and not for public consideration. I have shared here the minimum of broad information in hopes of educating the public.
Bright blessings upon you!
